Interested in the visual arts since her early childhood, Stephanie is a true all-rounder. Drawing, painting, collage, sculpture, writing and cinema are all avenues she has explored. Following a training in interior design and display, she works mainly in set and accessory making. Her taste for beautiful things, her ease in popularizing information as well as her exacerbated creativity leads her today to share with your creative parcels of her daily life.
Soft version: for the rest, please refer to the last two sentences!
A friend told me the other day:
You, Steph, you did all the jobs.
Mascot for a animal’s shelter, worker in a women’s center. Selling windows (Ha! Ha! That one he found it fun… I don’t see why… Anyway)! Diver, cook, busgirl, bartender, waitress and assistant manager; day, evening, weekend! Paint saleswoman, duck saleswoman, clothes saleswoman. Customer service at Revenu Québec government (I gave up after a month before I lost my hair); assistant props on a movie, extras for publicity and I forget some for sure!
For as long as I can remember, I’ve always asked myself the question: What am I going to do in life? And when it wasn’t me asking myself that question, it was the others. The number of headaches and great periods of anxiety and stress over one question… What do you want in life? AAAAAAAHHHH!!!! I don’t know… I’m going to study cinema at Cégep. I am 15 years old. What do you want to do in your life? I’m going on a trip to take a break and try to figure out what I want to do in life. I’m 20 years old. When I come back, people still ask me: have you found what you want to do with your life? I’m not sure, but I’m going to do a DEP in interior design because I don’t want to go to university in cinema. I want to make sets for films or the theater. I want to work on creative projects! I am 23 years old. I work for a set and display company. I put lights on giant wreaths from 8:30am to 4:30pm before the Christmas rush. I stress to pay my share of rent and eat. I am 25 years old. I sell paint at Réno-dépôt. I mix gallons and I place palettes at variable hours… I am 27 years old and I committed a murder!
I killed my creativity.
Tired of fighting to be seen and recognized. Tired of being stressed out to pay my rent, my bills and eat. I did it. It was still surprisingly simple. Schliiing!
Stab wound, right in the middle.
Okay, I may be 27 years old ½ or ¾… I work in an office and make home visits to give energy efficiency advice to vulnerable clients. Thirteen years ago, the word energy efficiency was a little less common. No one knows exactly what my job is but because there are complicated words, it sounds serious and it doesn’t sound worse in conversation. I am 28 years old.
I meet a great guy. I love him. We laugh, we travel, and we make a child. I’m 34 years old and I’m becoming a mom. I express my milk, I wipe tears, I fold stockings and mini pajamas. I take care of my family. I am 36 years old and I am becoming a mom a second time. What are you going to do when your maternity leave ends? That’s right! The old friend is back; my haunting question… What do you want to do with your life? I’m 37 years old. My quest for the grail begins.
I’m doing one job after another; I’m looking for my work-family balance everywhere.
– No, no, I don’t mind doing a job that I don’t like, if the schedule is good.
IIIIINNN! Error! I am 39 years old. (39 years old! Already!?) And then, right there after the end-of-year concert of the students at the music school where I work, I get into a fog. My Bermuda triangle but without sunshine. Just big fog.
Questions; doubts; fears; anxiety. From the outside, it doesn’t seem so. I continue to take care of everyone but inside, there is a call that begins to emerge from the fog. It takes time, but I eventually respond.
« Hello Stephanie »?
– Yes, I am.
– It’s Stephanie. It took you a long time to answer!
– Yeah, I know … I was cleaning in the basement …
– I couldn’t wait to talk to you! I want to remind you to dream; I want to remind you to create. You always have ideas for everything. You could be good at anything. You just have to free yourself and accept your creativity. I know you have Impersonator Syndrome, but you shouldn’t. Your confidence will make you do great things. Don’t worried to much about your family, they’re going to be there anyway. Accept the unknown; observe the signs and allow yourself to be happy.